• The Secret’s Out

    Yesterday, at exactly eleven weeks, Minh and I had our second doctor’s appointment for #THAB. We didn’t have an ultrasound this time, but we did get to hear the heartbeat! Thankfully Minh thought to record the audio on his phone, so now we have a takeaway to listen to until my next visit.

    The doctor said that after hearing the heartbeat, we were essentially in the clear to tell friends and family. So of course we told EVERYONE. I wanted to wait until Wednesday so I could ship my brother a t-shirt that said something like “I’m going to be an uncle,” but the proud daddy was too excited to wait a couple more days. My brother was ecstatic to learn that he’s going to be an uncle — apparently he’s already told everyone that we’re having a girl (which we won’t know until the labwork comes back next week)!

    I’m so excited now that the cat’s out of the bag! I can actually say things now!

    Also, can I just say how much I like being pregnant (so far)? Minh’s been making me smoothies every morning and rubbing my belly before he falls asleep at night. I tell myself he’s just doing it for baby, but I’m definitely not going to turn down special treatment! And, I’m starting to get some of my energy back, so hopefully I’ll have more strength to decorate the nursery and plan a little better. Here’s to my last 12 days of the first trimester (and beyond)!

  • The First View

    Today was #THAB’s first ultrasound. I had been mentally distancing myself from my pregnancy for the past few days as my appointment came closer. I had nightmares about waking up soaked in blood or sitting on the exam room table learning that I actually just had a blighted ovum. Every time Minh mentioned the baby this past week, I would respond with “maybe,” because in my mind, that would make it easier to cope if we received bad news.

    Minh held my hand this afternoon as we gawked up at the monitor across the room. I heard him gasp as our little baby come into focus. It was nothing more than a 9 mm blob, but its little heart flickered like crazy! The ultrasound technician confirmed that, as I predicted, I did ovulate a week later than what is “typical,” as baby measured 7 weeks exactly with a heartbeat of 144 bpm. That puts my due date at January 9, 2017. The doctor did inform us that my uterus is a little misshapen, which means that the baby might have a hard time turning when the time comes. All that means is that I have a higher risk of a breach presentation and a C-section may be in the cards. But the doctor said there’s nothing we could do about that and we’ll address it if it happens.

    After receiving word from the doctor and the ultrasound technician that baby is developing normally thus far, I’m kind of going through the same emotions that I did when I saw the positive pregnancy test. Really excited and relieved that everything is okay, but also really nervous for what lies ahead. There are a lot of changes in store for us (especially me) over the next year. I’ve been watching Teen Mom lately to increase my confidence that I can easily tackle all those changes.

    So far my pregnancy has been relatively uneventful, in the best of ways. Aside from some exhaustion (which is virtually indistinguishable from depression fatigue and is therefore no stranger to me), my only real symptoms have been sore boobs, increased thirst, and a heightened sense of smell. And an aversion to coffee and peanut butter cookies.

    ultrasound 052316_2

  • Oh Boy (or Girl)

    For the last four weeks I’ve distracted myself from baby-making, and instead focused on improving myself, my marriage and my home. I quit drinking as of April 14 and have focused that energy on deep-cleaning our house, running three half-marathons and maintaining a spreadsheet of landscape architects who can design our backyard. I haven’t even gone into #THAB’s nursery; the one baby-related thing I’ve been doing is logging my basal body temperature every day so I could predict when I would start my period.

    I took a pregnancy test this morning since my period was five days late. I hadn’t been paying too much attention to when it’d come because my mind had focused its energy on finding the most responsive landscape designer with the most impressive portfolio. But this morning I figured what the hell, I’ll waste a pregnancy test and get it over with (mostly because there’s an unspoken universal law that a girl will get her period within an hour of taking a pregnancy test). I was in a hurry to get to work, so when I saw it was going to be negative I flung it in the garbage and forgot about it.

    I remembered the test when I was on Reddit tonight and saw a user had posted a picture of a pregnancy test. The test was maybe positive — it was hard to tell. But it made me wonder about my test from this morning. Of course pregnancy tests (especially cheap ones) aren’t reliable if read after 10 minutes, but I headed to the bathroom to check, just in case. When I pulled the test out of the garbage I saw it.

    A second line.

    So I took another pregnancy test, not expecting much because first morning urine is the best to use for pregnancy tests (it was about 8 p.m. at that point). Within 15 seconds a second line appeared, and it was significantly darker than the one on the test from this morning.

    It took a couple seconds to even register that I was reading it correctly. Did I accidentally take an ovulation test or something? But Minh confirmed — there were definitely two lines on both tests. I’m definitely pregnant.

    While I wish I could say that I’m nothing but ecstatic, I’m honestly partially freaking out. I thankfully haven’t had a drop of alcohol since before conception/ovulation (which both happened on April 17, in case anyone’s wondering), but I drank a lot of coffee and Diet Coke. I mean, a lot of Diet Coke. And I ran a lot, which probably bounced poor little #THAB around quite a bit. And I touched up the purple on my bangs. And I cleaned the shower like three times and probably accidentally inhaled too much Scrubbing Bubbles.

    But when I stop to think about it, I was just living. Had we not taken April off to avoid a Christmas baby, it would have probably taken us much longer to conceive. I wasn’t obsessing over my temperature chart this month, and I started taking better care of my mental and physical health — for me. The perfect environment for a little one to decide the time is right.

    #TinyHalfAsianBaby is real, y’all. WE’RE HAVING A BABY!